Jeremiah 31:19 · World English Bible
Surely after that I was turned. I repented. After that I was instructed. I struck my thigh. I was ashamed, yes, even confounded, because I bore the reproach of my youth.’
He turned to them so they could turn: the turning back is given before it is done A line in the Quran puts the first move on God's side. Someone who has come back often assumes he managed it alone, then panics when he sees how weak his grip is.
From the Sufism reading below.
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SUFISM
He turned to them so they could turn: the turning back is given before it is done A line in the Quran puts the first move on God's side. Someone who has come back often assumes he managed it alone, then panics when he sees how weak his grip is. The pull he felt arrived before he chose anything, so the ground under his return is steadier than his own resolve.
Nadam: Regret The Prophet said that regret is repentance. A person who has already changed direction can think the pain arriving afterward is pointless, since the past cannot be moved. The ache is the wrong finally landing on him, and a wrong that has landed is one he stops defending.
Muḥāsaba: Taking account of yourself Al-Ghazali gives this a whole section of his Revival: a person going through his own record like a stack of bills he has been dodging. Clarity like that arrives after the danger has passed, since a person still defending himself cannot afford the details. Once he stops defending, the specifics come back, and the specifics are what teach him.
Nafs lawwāma: The self that blames itself The Quran names an inner voice that turns and accuses its own owner. Someone whose faults are far behind him still hears it, and he can take it for an enemy dragging him backward. The voice works more like a friend who will not let him pretend, and it quiets when he has nothing left to hide from himself.
Ḥayāʾ: Shame before God The tradition counts the burning in a person's face as part of faith. The sting bites hardest just after someone gets close again, since closeness is what makes the old behavior visible. The heat comes from caring about someone he hurt, and that care is what keeps him from drifting off again.
A fault that leaves you humbled is better than a good deed that leaves you proud: shame keeps a person low and close Ibn Ata Allah put it in one line. The words meet a person so embarrassed by his own history that he wants to hide from everyone, God included. Being brought this low keeps him honest about himself, and that honesty is what he lacked while he was doing the damage.
Sufism lens
What would I have to stop defending for the lesson to actually reach me?
Every night he went back over the day and put his own behavior on trial, asking where he had been harsh or false. He did it firmly but without tearing himself apart.
He told his son to look honestly at what he had done, and if it had caused harm, to admit it, tell someone, and not repeat it. No burying, no self-punishment either.
Maimonides taught that turning starts with naming the specific wrong out loud and feeling the sting of it, because the sting is what keeps you from going back.
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